11/20/2003 8:39 PM



Another bad day. Looking around at other people, wondering how they seem to keep it all together. I can’t seem to keep a grip on living. Seems like I’m either messing something up, or worrying about messing something up. In any case, there is rarely a bright point on the horizon to steer towards. When one does appear, it seems to flicker and die before I can really take a bearing on it. I wonder if I’m insane. Dave wouldn’t understand. Can’t talk to him about anything. He gets pissed off if I ask a question. He gets annoyed if I make a statement. Maybe it's just that I can't be around him. Maybe he makes me insane. He damn well makes me depressed. Why do I stay? 4 kids, no job. That's why. Used to be a tech geek for big money. Now I'm nothing.